Six Parenting Lessons from the Quran
Nowadays, more parents are becoming very intentional about the way their kids are raised however, when most of us think about learning to become great parents, we resort to books written by our peers and forget to look in the most important book, the Qur’an.The best parenting guidelines are on the pages of our Holy Qur'an in the pure words of our Creator.
Here are 6 parenting lessons from the Qur'an that will In Sha Allah guide you on your parenting journey.
Du'a is a parent's most powerful tool
The believer's weapon is du'a. Making regular dua' for our children is part of being a good parent; it is our children's right that we supplicate to the Almighty for them.
“Three duas will not be rejected by Allah: the du'a of the traveller, the du'a of one who is fasting, and the du'a of a parent for his child.”
Here is a powerful du'a for protection of our children.
“I seek protection for you in the Perfect Words of Allah from every devil and every beast, and from every envious blameworthy eye.”
As a parent, make abundant du'a for your children. It is one of the best things you can do for them. It would serve as their shield from evil in this life and the next.
Embody your teachings
We are the best role models for our children therefore, we will always need to walk our talk.
Here are some practical ways to walk your talk and embody your teachings as a parent.
- Stay clean and organized
- Be truthful and avoid lying
- Avoid talking badly about others
- Express gratitude to Allah at all times
- Be respectful to people around you
Trust me, your small ones will notice when you act in a way that is in alignment with what you teach them and vice versa. It all starts with you.
Patience is one of the most rewarded acts in Islam. We all know that it is not easy to be patient because if it was, everyone would be. But the few of us who manage to be patient in hard times will In sha Allah reap the benefits. Patience in parenting is a virtue and a lot of people do not possess it. This is why we need to be intentional about it.
Sometimes the distraction of young kids causes a mother to become upset, and she starts to shush them quiet and scold them away. But we need to remember that kids are kids and they have neither the knowledge nor the wisdom that we do. Therefore, correcting them with kindness and mercy will create much better results than irrational scolding.
Children could sometimes be a distraction to our ibadah but our responses in those moments are critical to how they grow to perceive the Deen.
The Prophet (SAW) was praying and he was carrying Umaamah the daughter of Zainab, the daughter of the Prophet (SAW). When he prostrated, he put her down, and when he stood, he carried her (on his neck).
(Bukhari and Muslim)
Learn about good parenting
The Quran comes with a message of Islam and the instructions to inform us in the world of parenthood and bringing up children. It is important for the us to seek guidance from the Quran while raising our children to understand the best way to raise them to become good Muslims.
It is important to invest time and energy in learning essential facts of good nutrition and habits during pregnancy, child psychology, emotional intelligence, parenting in the digital age, etc.
Apart from the Qur'an, there are other resources one can harness to learn about good parenting. These are books about the subject matter, video lectures, and so on. Just make sure that you trust your source.
To be a good parent, you have to forgive yourself and your kids. You will make mistakes and they will make mistakes as well. But it is a learning experience for all of you. It is only when you forgive that you can move past hurtful events.
Here is a du'a that can make it easier for you to be forgiving.
“O Allah, I seek refuge in You from evil character, evil actions, and evil desires” [Jami’ at-Tirmidhi]
Imagine the amount of trust your child will have in you when they know that no matter what happens, they can let you know and they trust that you will forgive them, advice them and move forward.
Teach them to be prayerful and rely on Allah
As Muslim parents, we must teach our children the importance of prayer and tawakkul.
Prophet Luqman said to his son in Surah Luqman, "O my son, establish prayer, enjoin what is right, forbid what is wrong, and be patient over what befalls you. Indeed, [all] that is of the matters [requiring] determination." [31:17]
Life is not a bed of roses and there would be ups and downs. We hope that even in our absence, our kids would thrive. To ensure this, they would need to place their trust in Allah and it is our responsibility to teach them to do that.
We want to raise children that would be the coolness of our eyes. Adults that make a positive impact in their communities. We all want to raise people who love and fear Allah, who are kind and trustworthy, and who live their lives according to the teachings of the Qur'an and the Sunnah of The Prophet (SAW).
To do this, we need to teach them from the best of sources and that is the Qur'an. We hope that you take these lessons and use them in your parenting. Whether you're a new parent or you have been parenting for some time, all these lessons are applicable to you.
May Allah guide us, guide our children, and make this journey easy and fruitful for us. Ameen.